scarring...

So I had a realization, that i'm sure people would be like "ofcourse". But i think when people are deeply emotionally hurt, they tend to have an unconcious fear of the same event occurring. Basically the response i had from two separate friends really surprised me.

At first, i thought they were being illogical (my fortay(sp?) mind you :) and when i thought back to what has happened to them, their actions only made sense. What even shook me more was the fact they were more deeply hurt considering what happened to them years ago.

In other news....People are deleting me from their friendster page! :) i think it might have been something i said. :) Honestly, i don't know, but to be deleted nonetheless still allows me to realize that people still think of me :) Maybe not as positively as i would like, but its still a start. I'm thinking it must be do to the video of me jumping on silent fart's bed. I knew i should have chose better music, and not gone with what was the first thing on silent fart's play list.


RD : )

scarring...

So I had a realization, that i'm sure people would be like "ofcourse". But i think when people are deeply emotionally hurt, they tend to have an unconcious fear of the same event occurring. Basically the response i had from two separate friends really surprised me.

At first, i thought they were being illogical (my fortay(sp?) mind you :) and when i thought back to what has happened to them, their actions only made sense. What even shook me more was the fact they were more deeply hurt considering what happened to them years ago.

In other news....People are deleting me from their friendster page! :) i think it might have been something i said. :) Honestly, i don't know, but to be deleted nonetheless still allows me to realize that people still think of me :) Maybe not as positively as i would like, but its still a start. I'm thinking it must be do to the video of me jumping on silent fart's bed. I knew i should have chose better music, and not gone with what was the first thing on silent fart's play list.


RD : )

Last week

Had another amazing week. Went to Windsor, Cananda then milwaukee, helped two great friends move and finally a blast of weekend. Saw people i haven't seen in awhile, and literally witnessed a friend of mine laugh so hard she started crying because of a humorous comment by yours truly, or maybe it was the gaseous odor evaporating from my gastrointestinal sysytem...hmmm? well, i prefer to think it was the comment, and yes, type A individuals sometimes do have their humorous moments, granted, not as often as type B people like dandruffy who doesn't know what it even means to exemplify the life of a gunner.

OH, and i finally went to that matchbox place at ogden and milwaukee! It was actually voted one of the best bars in the nation! Deservedly so. As for my alcohol tolerance...still pretty miserable :( It seems like all it takes now is 3 beers and i'm on the ground, oh where oh where are my super powers of chuggin liters of beer when i need them :(

And dandruffy, before you exhibit a picture of yours truly lying on the ground...remember...

I can post movies :)

and...silent fart, hope your feeling better.

RD

FOUND

so i lost my cell phone ear piece, and my parents gave me another one. SO, i'm cleaning my room, and i've decided to finally do the pile of clothes that hiding my carpet and whoa and behold! My ear piece! Now i have two! :)

Its always fun finding stuff you've forgotten you had. Its like christmas all over again.

rd : )

My Space,

I saw this on a friends page. Yes, i've gotten addicted to my space :( HELP ME!

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

In homage to the world cup

Fire fly

I love this intro to one of my top favorite sci fi shows :)

CONFESSION...

Well, i know this is something i should have been up front about. Im actually kind of really embarassed about this, so i will just come out and say it.

Well, first...please dont judge me. Please dont think differently of me. Personally i dont see how its even my fault. Basically, i don't...have...an ipod. :(

Blank

I want to write something witty on this blog, but am drawing a blank. Therefore this blog will require that the reader think of something witty in the following blank..._________.

Not so easy, is it? :)

RD :)

BIKED!!!

I just biked to work yesterday, and back today. It was awesome! It took me 17 minutes to get there, and on the way back, exactly 14 minutes.

The bike ride itself is 3.3 miles, really nothing in biking terms but nonetheless, alot of fun.

The only thing that sucks is changing at work in the bathroom. Also work is going okay. I realized i can't do this forever. I talked to a friend of mine last night (she works overnights too) and she said she doesn't see herself doing this too long either. SO, i was like, how long do you see yourself doing this...and she replies "five years".

I was like, oh my god, i can see myself for at least another five months.

Question of the night was a phone call...

"this drug (a liquid) is suppose to be grape?" I check what the drug is, and i'm like its grape flavored. The person replies back, "Oh! well, its not purple, its more whitish clear, are you sure its grape flavored?"

RD :)

stocks

i'm now the official owner of some walgreens stocks. And yet, i don't feel any different :(

boat cruise

 

this is from a boat cruise on last monday. It was Martin's medschool graduating party.

RD : ) 

Why (part dos)

I went to sleep at 3pm, and slept till 11pm. Now i'm going to try and go to bed again. I thought bears were to hibernate in the winter...?

Why!

Why Am I up!? :( I only slept for four hours, and now i'm up!? :( This is not good. Plus this hangover isn't helping any :(

Well, going home, and i might even see a friend today that i haven't seen in a couple of years.


rd

runaway...

Sometimes i just want to run away...witht he circus. BUT then i pause and realize...my life is a circus.

Now who didn't see that coming?

Today i was thinking maybe quitting walgreens and moving to california. I'm sooo un-motivated here. Honestly, when i went back to U of I, i actually slept on brad's floor (carpet to be technical) for a semester. And if there is anything i've ever learned, sleeping on someone else's floor can be quite motivating.

Maybe I should go to california, and sleep on jay's floor? Whats weird, is that right now i'm actually having an incredible time in chicago on my off week. Why do i feel the need to leave or that something's missing?

RD : )

p.s. I was going to put a picture of a clown, but they scare me :(

2 more nights

2 more overnights. Becoming bitter :(

Next week should be alot of fun. I feel bad, i was to go to michigan, but now the list of events doesn't fit anymore : ( and i had to bail :(

rd : )

Rambling sukatash batman!

I'm kind of tired, working overnights at the easiest job at walgreens right now. I've also been inspired by back to back people the last two days.

Friend A: Stopped by, and he works part time for walgreens. Whats crazy though, he lives really frugally, AND then just goes on months vacations. He's actually left for paris yesterday and is going to be there for 2 months. His goal is to learn the language (french) and to make some type of french pastry.

Friend B: She actually works overnights too. She basically works overtime like crazy (40-50) hours on her off week and then travels internationally to places like africa and so forth. She's going to russia for her next big trip.

SO, whats the point of all this, i'm not sure. BUT, i'm soooo tempted to just go part time, and do what my friend A does. He actually did improv, and did groups. He's pretty fascinating actually. Plus he knows how to jugle! Which is just generally cool.

I also figured the point of all this is that I guess i'm at a junction to either look at pharmacy as a job or career. Both of these friends are of the opinon that its a job, and you should enjoy life. Ironically, they both made the point that they wanted to live life now. They both even made the point that your not guaranteed to live to sixty, or that if you do, chances are that your going to be on quite a few medications too.

Friend A also mentioned that he's not envious of the uncles/aunts (he's indian) : ) that go to alaska or wherever. Cuz he knows exactly what they did, they went to some sights, probably ate fancy, and stayed at a nice hotel possibly. He says he wants to live like the locals, and see what its like to experience the culture rather than look at it. In a weird sort of way, i was inspired.

What i found interesting with both of these people is that they both encountered death early. Friend A with a father passing away at an early age, and friend B with a horrifying car accident in which she walked away from with out a scratch.

Where does this leave me? I'm not sure, but i do know that i've had near encounters with the great beyond too. SO, where does this exactly leave me then...?

Well, i guess to be exact, in front of a computer typing this : )