SO, i can't sleep. Still. THis is definitely a first. SO, i've decided to write. When i couldn't sleep before i would write in my journal and that helped alot. Now, i don't have a journal, except for maybe this. Stuff in which one can regret later :)
Anyways, is this helping? Not sure. SO, i've decided to do the next best thing. Jam to "insomnia" by faithless. Awesome song and quite justifiable right now. Maybe i should blog the words.
"deep in bosom of the gentle night"
"dark forces in the clear moon light"
"i can't get no sleep"
i'm done copying the lyrics. SO, whats keeping me up? Probably obvious. The ticking clock, so much to do tomorrow. GOSH, the one thing about working overnights, it really has made me make the most of my time. Tick tock, tick tock. Honestly its that alot is on my mind. I guess thats why i can't sleep. Plus as always, so much i want to do :(
So tomorrow, hopefully entertain a couple of people, maybe try to see namesake tomorrow. Peer pressure has gotten so intense on how great the movie is, that i've succumbed : (
OH, friends engagement tomorrow! Excited about that. Practiced a dance, where at least i can get by now. Its great being in it though. I've forgotten how much i've missed all of them in the dance. We all use to be really good friends, but now i stay in touch with just a couple of them. All of them are really good people.
SO, i read "running with scissors" finally. Good book. Very humorous. But there is so much symbols in the book. This family the book is about constantly is looking for symbols on what this means, or that. Now i've found myself doing the same thing! Really weird. For example, i decided to treat the assistant manager and sales clerk to dinner. Not a big deal, they're pretty nice, hard workers, and i just wanted to.
SO, the place i got the food from gave me a 20% discount (randomly) and then gave some extra food. Well, after reading the book, its like not a coincidence, but it absolutely is.
OH, symbols. SO
where practice was tonight, i was really close to where he's moving from. So i thought that situation was way too convenient to help him move, but i guess they changed their minds and now..."i can't get no sleep". :) Funny, if i stayed down in homewood, i would have probably been getting up right now from the lack of chugging caffeine at midnight. :) what ifs, what ifs. The choreographer though was great, she was totally cool with me crashing there as well as her parents. PLUS! ATE probably the best indian food in awhile. It was different, but phenomenal. She also made me a cd with some awesome indian music.
But then again when you act like a man-child and throw a little tantrum, people will do anything to shut you up :)
Honored at workBasically there is a customer/patient who comes in around the early morning and we usually chat a bit, and he lets me know how he and is wife are doing. Its the type of person you wish all your patients/customers were like. Anyways, he came in a couple of nights ago and he told me that they're leaving for puerto rico. He mentioned it before, but i didn't really think he was going to do it. But he is. He's like 67 or something, and now he's leaving. I am genuinely sad to see him leaving chicago. He said that he appreciated everything i've done for him and his wife and gave me a parting gift. I'll remember him forever. If there is one thing i never forget, its kindness. I never forget kindness or little things. It bums me out though, cuz you know you can relax when you see him out the counter, and he would say things to people if he felt they were being out of line. That was nice and i will miss him.
Like a friend of mine who was leaving my place took out my trash. Or how some of them well take a little time out of their day (technically night) and visit. Its kind, and it makes me feel human. Shoutout to N and A yesterday for coming by :)
YOu would think that after such events, i would be staying there for alot longer. I'm really lucky. I have 2 of my bestfriends working the same shift. Reconnected with two other friends, and made a couple of new ones working over night. On top of that, my manager is a friend from school who witnessed first hand my slacker ways.
But i feel like i have to go. I'm going to interview with this nuclear pharmacy, and see what they offer. Will i take it? I'm not sure. Its repetitive work, but less stress. Plus the health hazards. As much as i would like to think, working with nuclear stuff gives one super powers - it doesn't. Honestly, i would probably have to freeze some little ones, if you know what i mean ;)
What else? Obviously the whole marriage pressure thing. I think my parents are great in not pressuring me. Its such a cross roads. What i find interesting, how does one know they want to be married, if they have never done before? How is there this want, for something thats statistically has a fifty percent chance of failing? HMMMmmmmm, i don't know. I did have an epiphany though...
When you meet the right person, you will know. You can't imagine your life without them. I find that very interesting. SO, since i've probably not met the person (or maybe i have, who knows) i will not be able to comprehend the concept of marriage. Maybe it has to be experienced, in order to be understood. I can see where my parents are coming from. I'm sure they feel their kids are the best thing thats happened to them. This is in their case, do to their marriage. THUS in their case, their marriage --->best thing thats happened to them (i.e., their kids).
I'm also thinking that the next girl i do / if ever date, may be the girl i'll end up with. I think thats why i'm sooooo tentative on the whole dating thing. I've also been getting / feeling vibes of late. Haven't had that for a long time. Interesting nonetheless. Who knows.
Whats even funnier, i think the way we go about meeting people. Obviously i haven't met anyone going out, yet i think that how one meets a girl or dates or whatever...by going out. I find that just hilarious. I guess wouldn't that constitute insanity? I don't know : )
I'm still babbling. I wonder if anyone reads this? Why do i even have a blog. Everyone i've even linked it to, don't even write it anymore. I thought it would be a good way to keep in touch with people, but people aren't staying in touch. Is a blog egotistical? I don't know. I guess its nice to have a record that you actually existed somewhere. Kind of like a little sign post that says , "hey, i existed, and this is what i kind of was like". I don' t know. I guess for me it is the latter. Its nice to have a public record of what i kind of was like.
Anyways, i'm tired. Have to sleep. Probably sleep till 1pm or so. Get ready, and start my marathon party session tonight. Maybe i should stock up on the very thing thats keeping me up right now.
"i can't get no sleep"
